Well, so, this is kind of a big deal. I’m engaged. Feel free to send me a gift certificate to Chili’s* or something.
I’ve been engaged for about a year now. You weren’t aware? That’s because I’m not one of those girls who’s like, “I’M GETTING MARRIED!”
I don’t even like weddings. Or bridal showers. I don’t like poufy white dresses. I hate the wedding industrial complex. The whole thing makes me feel awkward. The feminist in me has a problem with a lot of the patriarchal traditions that go along with weddings. And yet…
I’m still going to get married. And I wish that everybody could.
So anyway, recently I was like, Crap, I’ve been engaged for a year. I should probably start planning a wedding.
But I don’t want to. Ugh. It feels like homework. And then I might have to wear a white dress. Gross.
There’s really no point to this post. Just me whining. And if somebody wants to plan my wedding for free, be my guest.
*If you think I’d ever actually use a gift certificate to Chili’s then you don’t know me very well.
So if you don't like weddings, why plan one? I was the same way, so instead we booked time with a minister and dressed in whatever the hell we wanted (I wore a blue dress), and got married in less than an hour. We only told close friends (who we needed as witnesses) the week before. Just because everyone else does the big wedding thing, doesn't mean you have to. Besides, I found the informal wedding to be so much more meaningful than a wedding and a party could ever have been. Our wedding was about us and no one else and that's how weddings should be.
Can you pick something fun to plan first? Whatever gets you going--music, dress, flowers, cake, food--and then just take baby steps from there? It shouldn't feel like homework, it should feel like FUN!
Congratulations!! I was not one of those girls who planned their wedding since they were five. But I did plan it eventually and I wore a white dress. I had an open house but no line. I hate those. I also incidentally love weddings. I might have been a wedding planner in a past life. I do have some ideas for you. First, ask your parents if they plan on helping you out with wedding funds. If they are, would they be willing to give you the money they plan on spending and let you spend less ans pocket the rest. Example: they give you $5000 for wedding, you spend $500 on wedding and go on an awesome honeymoon or build a nest egg. Whatever. As far as actual wedding plans go, who cares what color your dress is! Or if you even wear one....but you should definitely wear something. Nudity is frowned upon in general. What is something you always wanted to dress up as? Have a costume wedding. What do you love to do? Fish? Go out on a charter and have the Captain marry you. Ski? Try Hilltop in snow gear. Something fun, memorable, unique. It doesn't have to be traditional and white. Just make sure that your fiancée is ok with it. That way you won't start your marriage with a fight. You also don't have to have a bridal shower. You could do a bachelorette instead if your friends were really bugging you about having something. My sister in law got married on New Years Day. She told us the day before. We all hiked down to the mud flats in the -7F weather and she got married in her snow pants. Afterwards we went to Gallos and feasted. The weirdness made it fun and very memorable! Well, im not sure what I've already said. I'm commenting from my phone and it won't let me scroll up. But just don't let anyone sucker you into thinking you have to be traditional. Elope to the courthouse in your pj's if you want. Do it in a way that fits you! ( and I guess you fiancé too. Lol)
I hated planning a wedding..so my then fiance planned everything..I am a bit of a control freak so it was tough letting him have all the control..but we got married on the beach with only family and close friends at sunset..it was beautiful! Good luck; you will find a way to make it you!
congrats, lady!! i had fun planning mine only because it was a weird and challenging theme that everyone cringed at and said would never work. also, my mom made my dress by hand. i hated stepping into bridal shops *shudders* if anything, i would say have a party. it's a big celebration in your life. even if you wear jeans and a tshirt, celebrate your marriage with friends. whatever you do, it will be amazing and totally you. i'm super happy for you!