La Alaskena

I try to do Lent every year, even though I’m not Catholic, or even religious in any traditional sense of the word. Frankly, it’s a little stunt I like to pull, just to see if I can.

One time I gave up smoking. It was so easy. Probably because I had never started smoking to begin with. But you should have seen how impressed people were when they found out I quit cold turkey! “No, no cravings at all,” I’d say. “I didn’t know you smoked,” they’d say, and then I’d have to change the subject.

Last year I gave up bread. This was not easy, because bread is to Andrea what crack is to crackheads. I started by eschewing all forms of bread (even pancakes!) but you know… I became irritable and impossible to live with, blah blah blah. I decided that bready things that weren’t actually called bread were ok. Muffins? Ok! Scones? You bet! Cake? Do you even have to ask?

Bread just kept creeping back on the menu, but you know what? I went without leavened, sliced bread for forty whole days, and I’m proud of it.

This year I was having a heck of a time coming up with something. I like it to be a challenge, but an manageable challenge. The odds that I can do it have to be pretty good. I don’t like setting myself up for failure. This is why legal drugs like chocolate, Diet Pepsi, coffee and Facebook are not up for discussion. I could give up television, but a life without television is not a life I’m interested in living. (Not even kidding.)

So this is the year of Vegan Lent. Cutting out meat 3 years ago was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be. I just stopped eating meat and never looked back. But cheese? Oh cheese! How I love thee. Cheese is to Andrea what crack is to crackheads. Literally.

But cheese, you make me feel so guilty. The milk used to make you comes from cows that are abused horribly. You’re not good for me. You’re not good for cows. You’re not good for the environment. I think we should break up… on Wednesday.

Please note: I am not trying to guilt anybody into veganism. I am sharing the reasons I feel I should become a vegan, and it’s a decision that’s not up for debate.