I have embarrassing taste in music. This I admit freely. I like banda, which is basically Mexican polka music. I like Ukrainian pop. I listen to The Chipmunks’ Christmas album year-round. But I have hit an all-time low. This is hard for me to say, but I like Paris Hilton’s new album.
Paris Hilton owes everything to her producer, Scott Storch. He wears sunglasses at night, a crime almost unforgivable except that he produces the most delicious, fluffy, inconsequential pop music. He produced Ricky Martin’s last album, which I also loved. Paris’ music is obviously engineered and pitch-corrected, but who really gives a damn? “Stars Are Blind” is catchier than gonorrhea.
A lot of the music was obviously influenced by Paris’ ginormous self-esteem. In “Fightin’ Over Me”, featuring Fat Joe and Jadakiss (street cred!), Paris claims that everywhere she goes there are gentlemen fighting over her. My guess is that she’s talking about the paparazzi fighting over the next money shot of her bunky, which she displays pretty much every time she enters or exits a vehicle.
So yeah, I’m a Paris fan. Not exactly a proud fan, but a fan nonetheless. And for all you haters that say Paris is dumb, I suggest you watch the episode of “The Simple Life” where she cleans the kitchen floor by attaching a broom to the back of a Segway Scooter and zooms around. Genius. Especially the part where she crashes.
